I had an Uncle name of Matthew.....

No, not really. But this past weekend I was reminded of the John Denver song about Uncle Matthew, more on that later.
I went to Kansas to surprise my Great Aunt on her 85th birthday. She lives in El Dorado, Kansas. My family has a very long history in that town. When I was growing up, I listened to my families stories of life in Kansas.
I grew up in Southern California. Orange County.....far away from Kansas. I listened to the stories of another time, another place and I really had no interest in them. I lived one mile from Disneyland. I had the beach, big cities, lots of friends. All of the things that I thought Kansas lacked.
My grandfather loved Kansas. He loved farming. He loved the out of doors. Due to some family hardships, he was forced to move to southern California. He never got over Kansas though.
He had made a vow never to return to Kansas. When I was little I thought it was because he did not like the state or the lifestyle. I learned that it was because it was too heartbreaking to return.
Once, when on a long family trip, my grandfather drove from Washington D.C. to Colorado, completely bypassing Kansas. Look at a map of the U.S and figure that one out.
I was 13 at the time and I just wanted to get home to see my friends. I was so mad at him for lengthening our trip by going around Kansas. I argued, begged and pleaded to continue on I-70 through Kansas. He refused. I normally won arguments with my grandfather and could not figure out why I was losing this one. With one final attempt I cried, "Why won't you go through Kansas?" I still remember his short but succinct reply, "Because I am as stubborn as you. When I don't want to do something, I don't."
There was no arguing after that remark. I did not argue for a couple of reasons. One, he was right. If I did not want to do something, I did not do it. And second, I realized that for my whole childhood, he had let me win every argument. He did not understand every choice I made, but he did understand my stubbornness. This was the first time I understood his. I thought since he let me win all the other times, I can give him this one. We did not go through Kansas. I did not see Kansas until after he died.
The first time I went, I finally understood what he missed. We went to the old farm where he was born. I saw the one-room school house where my Nana taught. I saw the old courthouse where my Nana and Gramps were married. I saw the old creek that he would play in as a child. I saw huge old black walnut trees that gave more shade than I thought was possible in Kansas. I understood why it broke my grandfather's heart to leave Kansas. It was beautiful. I did not picture Kansas like that at all. I felt sad that I never got to visit these places with my grandfather. Yet, he was there all the same.
This past weekend when I returned after a 15 year absence, I felt the same presence of my ancestors there. When I was laughing to the point of tears with my Kansas family, I felt the same familiar feeling I had when I was a child. I felt loved, I felt family connections to the town and I saw shadows of the people that I had loved that are no longer with us.
It was through the family and the drive that I was reminded of John Denver's song, Uncle Matthew.
"Joy was just a thing he was raised on.
Love was just a way to live and die.
Gold was just a windy Kansas wheat field,
and blue just a Kansas summer sky."

In one weekend I experienced the joy and love that the song talks about. I also saw the gold and the blue of Kansas. I forget sometimes that I do not have to go half way around the world to have the trip of a lifetime.

Do you have someone in your family that is your 'Uncle Matthew?' Maybe the way to get to know them better and to understand the 'joy that they were raised with' is to see the world through their eyes.